Breathing and Self-Exploration Exercise

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Breathing and Self-Exploration Exercise

Postby danny » Fri Sep 03, 2010 1:26 am

Hi,

So tonight I decided, even though I was tired and sort of out of it, to do a session. This session lasted about 35-40 min in total.

I made sure I focused a lot on consistent deep breathing.

First, I warmed my self up by breathing and moving my body for a couple minutes (like we did in the workshop Gerek). Then I felt pretty warm and my body was quite alive. I then spent a few minutes standing, and massaging my body. Then I got on the bed and continued massaging, caressing, and all. All this time I kept breathing and I also stayed aware of the sensations in my body.

Eventually, I used some lotion and continued massaging, especially my chest. I then included my genitals. My arousal felt quite low. I felt very alive and good, and energetic, but my sexual energy was quite low. It seemed to wake up when I touched my genitals although still quite low.

Anyways, I continued stimulating genitals while using my free hand on my chest and arms and all. I was breathing deep and it seemed to help me relax my pelvic area.

I played with the arousal levels for quite a while. I got up to 9 once, backed off and some pre-ejaculation came out.

I then continued playing around for a long time, and felt my arousal was a little lower. Then at about 40 minutes in, I started to go closer to 9 again. I figured I might as well play on the edge. A similar occurrence happened to me this time as last time, I got very close, took some deep breaths, felt a little bit of tingling in my stomach and then some kind of energy and then ejaculation was triggered.

That was it, I stopped then, my penis hurt when I touched it.

So here is the important observations about the experience About half way through, I started feeling tingling all over my body, and when I followed it with my attention, it intensified if I paid attention to it. This feeling was basically like the feeling you get if you hyperventilate which I think I do when I breath consciously.

I felt this time around, I had a lot of control in a certain sense and I could get my arousal down well.

I did not think about a partner or love or anything that really normally excites me. I tried to just be with me and not get into my head.

I felt very low sexual energy. I felt relaxed yes, and energetic, but I really didn't feel very much sexual energy.

I did not feel that there was actually sexual energy leaving my pelvis.....to be honest, I now don't even know what that even means.

My body did not feel very excited at all, just relaxed. After ejaculation, I felt somewhat charged, didn't get the down I usually get, except the sexual energy certainly went way down.

Overall, there were some good points. But part of me just feels very disappointed. I feel like I do everything right, but I can't get past this "energy staying in the pelvis" bullshit. I really don't know what to do. It just isn't moving. I am not feeling turned on.

I felt nice a lot, but I just wanted to feel the sexual energy, but of course it seems to go nowhere, just straight to my pc which seems to just pump the semen until it just ejaculates.

I may need to edit this tomorrow, because I am too tired right now and am having trouble getting across my thoughts, but thanks for reading for right now, anyways.

Thanks.....Daniel
danny
 


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